[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ fullwidth=”on” _builder_version=”4.16″ bottom_divider_style=”slant” bottom_divider_color=”#ffffff” bottom_divider_flip=”horizontal” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_fullwidth_header title=”Stand-up Comedy” text_orientation=”center” background_overlay_color=”rgba(52,81,104,0.8)” _builder_version=”4.16″ title_font=”Lato|700|||||||” title_font_size=”46px” title_line_height=”1.5em” content_font=”Lato||||||||” content_font_size=”20px” subhead_font=”Lato|700|||||||” subhead_font_size=”25px” subhead_line_height=”1.5em” background_color=”#afafaf” background_image=”http:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/mic.jpg” background_position=”center_right” custom_margin=”|||” custom_padding=”5vw||150px||false” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”top” animation_intensity_slide=”2%” title_font_size_tablet=”36px” title_font_size_phone=”” title_font_size_last_edited=”on|phone” global_colors_info=”{}” button_one_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off”][\/et_pb_fullwidth_header][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”About Me” _builder_version=”4.16″ background_color=”#ffffff” custom_padding=”||150px||false|false” bottom_divider_style=”slant” bottom_divider_color=”#345168″ bottom_divider_flip=”horizontal” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row column_structure=”2_5,3_5″ _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”2_5″ _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_image src=”http:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/forever-young.jpg” _builder_version=”4.16″ transform_rotate=”0deg|0deg|356deg” box_shadow_style=”preset1″ global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_image][\/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”3_5″ _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.16″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n
Do you find that idiots have the most annoying ways of getting to the point? They feel the need to inject all kinds of extraneous phrases into their talking to elevate their pointlessness. And we suffer through their blah<\/strong> . . . blah<\/strong> . . . blah<\/strong>, feeling like poking a pencil in our eye, killing ourselves, or shouting out, \u201cShut the F up!\u201d<\/p>\n Like when you\u2019re at a show and the announcer comes out on stage and says, \u201cI\u2019m happy to announce . . .\u201d Or says, \u201cIt gives me pleasure . . .\u201d Do you get the urge to shout out, \u201cJust do the announcing. I could give a rat\u2019s ass whether you\u2019re happy or not. And about the thing that gives you pleasure . . . if you\u2019re planning to pleasure yourself, you\u2019ll need to leave the stage. I\u2019m here with my wife and kids!\u201d<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row column_structure=”3_5,2_5″ _builder_version=”4.16″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”3_5″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.16″ text_font=”Lato||||||||” link_font=”||||||||” ul_font=”||||||||” ol_font=”||||||||” quote_font=”||||||||” header_font=”||||||||” header_2_font=”Lato|700|||||||” header_2_font_size=”30px” header_2_letter_spacing=”1px” header_2_line_height=”1.5em” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”bottom” animation_intensity_slide=”5%” header_2_font_size_tablet=”” header_2_font_size_phone=”22px” header_2_font_size_last_edited=”on|phone” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_blurb title=”\u201cNo . . . I\u2019m not your age . . . you old fart!!\u201d (At the pool with seniors in Miami Beach)” use_icon=”on” font_icon=”||divi||400″ icon_color=”#ffb356″ icon_placement=”left” image_icon_width=”22px” content_max_width=”1100px” _builder_version=”4.16″ header_font=”Lato|700|||||||” header_font_size=”16px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”||||||||” custom_margin=”|||” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”bottom” animation_intensity_slide=”5%” icon_font_size=”22px” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_blurb][et_pb_blurb title=”\u201cAre those real?\u201d (The women of South Beach)” use_icon=”on” font_icon=”||divi||400″ icon_color=”#ffb356″ icon_placement=”left” image_icon_width=”22px” content_max_width=”1100px” _builder_version=”4.16″ header_font=”Lato|700|||||||” header_font_size=”16px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”||||||||” custom_margin=”|||” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”bottom” animation_intensity_slide=”5%” icon_font_size=”22px” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_blurb][et_pb_blurb title=”\u201cDid you shit yourself?\u201d (Seniors and their bowel movements) ” use_icon=”on” font_icon=”||divi||400″ icon_color=”#ffb356″ icon_placement=”left” image_icon_width=”22px” content_max_width=”1100px” _builder_version=”4.16″ header_font=”Lato|700|||||||” header_font_size=”16px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”||||||||” custom_margin=”|||” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”bottom” animation_intensity_slide=”5%” icon_font_size=”22px” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_blurb][et_pb_blurb title=”\u201cMax . . . do you wash that thing?\u201d (Intimate times)” use_icon=”on” font_icon=”||divi||400″ icon_color=”#ffb356″ icon_placement=”left” image_icon_width=”22px” content_max_width=”1100px” _builder_version=”4.16″ header_font=”Lato|700|||||||” header_font_size=”16px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”||||||||” custom_margin=”|||” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”bottom” animation_intensity_slide=”5%” icon_font_size=”22px” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_blurb][et_pb_blurb title=”\u201cYep . . . that part of me is lethargic.\u201d (Being a born-again virgin) ” use_icon=”on” font_icon=”||divi||400″ icon_color=”#ffb356″ icon_placement=”left” image_icon_width=”22px” content_max_width=”1100px” _builder_version=”4.16″ header_font=”Lato|700|||||||” header_font_size=”16px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”||||||||” custom_margin=”|||” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”bottom” animation_intensity_slide=”5%” icon_font_size=”22px” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_blurb][et_pb_blurb title=”\u201cI have an enlarged prostate! And \u2014 where\u2019re my shoes?\u201d (Airport experiences) ” use_icon=”on” font_icon=”||divi||400″ icon_color=”#ffb356″ icon_placement=”left” image_icon_width=”22px” content_max_width=”1100px” _builder_version=”4.16″ header_font=”Lato|700|||||||” header_font_size=”16px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”||||||||” custom_margin=”|||” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”bottom” animation_intensity_slide=”5%” icon_font_size=”22px” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_blurb][et_pb_blurb title=”\u201cDon\u2019t you remember me?\u201d (Pranking old ladies on the boardwalk, at the beach)” use_icon=”on” font_icon=”||divi||400″ icon_color=”#ffb356″ icon_placement=”left” image_icon_width=”22px” content_max_width=”1100px” _builder_version=”4.16″ header_font=”Lato|700|||||||” header_font_size=”16px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”||||||||” custom_margin=”|||” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”bottom” animation_intensity_slide=”5%” icon_font_size=”22px” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_blurb][et_pb_blurb title=”\u201cHello, Irving! What do you mean, you don\u2019t know who I am?\u201d (Prank phone calls)” use_icon=”on” font_icon=”||divi||400″ icon_color=”#ffb356″ icon_placement=”left” image_icon_width=”22px” content_max_width=”1100px” _builder_version=”4.16″ header_font=”Lato|700|||||||” header_font_size=”16px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”||||||||” custom_margin=”|||” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”bottom” animation_intensity_slide=”5%” icon_font_size=”22px” locked=”off” global_colors_info=”{}”][\/et_pb_blurb][\/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”2_5″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/10\/marc-standup.jpg” alt=”Marc Gellman performing stand-up comedy” title_text=”marc-standup” align=”center” _builder_version=”4.18.0″ _module_preset=”default” transform_translate=”2px|-120px” transform_translate_linked=”off” transform_rotate=”0deg|0deg|8deg” hover_enabled=”0″ 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They feel the need to inject all kinds of extraneous phrases into their talking to elevate their pointlessness. And we suffer through their blah . . . blah . . . blah, feeling like poking a pencil in our eye, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":146,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/72"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=72"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/72\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1823,"href":"https:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/72\/revisions\/1823"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/146"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/marcgellman.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=72"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Other routines:<\/h2>\n